i hate not being able to sleep

It's one of those nights that I get when I work in the evenings... I am not able to sleep and I've tired all the things that I usually do to make myself tired. but so far nothing has worked. I guess I'm just thinking a bit too much for myself to relax. I don't even know why I'm stressed out about it. It's not even a big deal. I see people here going on about their problems about their relationships or past relationships... and I know that is all hard but I look at myself and say "at least they were able to hold someone close in the last month or few months."
It's been almost 2 years since I've called someone my sweetheart. And I kind of miss it. I am not the type to enjoy being single for a long period of time. Sure it's relaxing and stress free but I just want to be able to share something with someone that is intimate and has so much meaning that it would hurt.
I find it funny that the girl I once had a very big crush on is injured because her most recent ex tried to kill her with a broken beer bottle. and I'm just sitting there thinking.. "I would have taken care of you and if I were there I would have protected you from her." and she said "I really do try to stay away from her but I can't sleep alone... I'm so codependent..." and in my head I'm thinking "I would sleep with you." and of course i meant it as a comforting type thing.. Just the thought of sleeping next to someone makes me ache with longing. ehh I'm corny like that.
I don't know I'm just rambling about my non-existent love life. haha
Sometimes it's just really small things that I really need. I think I just really need someone to be there for me. Oh and I've come to realize that if when I ever am able to have sex again I know that I'm going to make it count and do everything with a passion because I'll never know when I'm going to be able to do that again. That is sad... I know. 2 years is a long time.. And to make that worse the 2 year mark is on my birthday... woo..

Ich weiss nicht.... I don't know...
but I know one thing... my neighbors need to stop partying.. it's 3 in the morning... I'm surprised no one called the cops on them.... specially in the type of neighborhood I live in. lol I'm grumpy... shush