my aunt died and i found out last thursday
i love her dearly and nothing wll ever change that. but i cannot get myself to vent and even though i shouldn't be at school at all i'm going anyways, and i explode in randome bursts. now those bursts can be rage or crying.

for years i have been i guess trying to be noticed for something i'm good at other than martial arts, something that is me that people love, and if they don't i don't give a shit. and i finally have the oportunity...

spin

why cant they stop
and look at my face
for just 5 minuts
cant they see
that they aren't just
hurting themselfs
their hurting me too
my family mom dad
kirsten and grandma
all are hurting themselfs
and enjoying it's not "cool"
it's not right
and it effects every one
cant they see it
cant they tell
that they are hurting me
not just at home
not just in the car
at school too
people...

spin

little girl in the corner
whats your name

'name, whats a name but letters bunched together

little girl in the corner
why is there blood on the floor

'blood? what blood all i see is tragedy

little girl in the corner
whats wrong you look like your in pain

'pain, two ways crossing and twisting yet combined,body and mind

little girl in the corner
what happened

'too many choices, too many...

spin

the world is full
of busses and trains
people with cars and people on planes

but around every corner
there are secret truths that reside
with expressions on my face that i try to hide

this face
my mask my disguise
hides horrible experiences you can't even begin to realize

looking back on every punch i've been thrown
remembering all the bruises and blood
every single perverted hug

feeling so glad that...

spin

okay this is such bull shit.

i love poi i really do with all of my heart.

i live for poi. poi is pretty much all i'm good at.

and at my tryouts for pact/nuts (aka night under the stars) i was spinning and giving it almost my all and i decided to do (what i call) a split leg swich, and when i went to do it my glowstickS BROKE OFF!!! and when they broke off it distracted me and i wasn't paying attention to the landing. and i hurt my ankle. bad.
(but...

spin